Most days I am asked how I manage to do all the things I do. Usually my answer is something along the lines of, “It is what it is.” You may quote me on that. Everything that I have in life is mine to deal with, and there is fat lot I can do about it. I can ignore it, but it isn’t going to go away. So how do I deal with life as I know it? One step at a time. One moment at a time. One breath at a time. Some days, I roll over and put one foot on the floor at a time, and the only thing I can find to be thankful for, is another day vertical. For me, that is enough. It is okay. I don’t want everyone to feel sorry for me. I can do this. I have been doing this for a long time now. I like to stay busy, over-thinkers need to stay busy. Otherwise, they end to find themselves thinking too much, which leads to trouble (not that I would know).
The truth is that I go and go until I hit the wall, and then I stop. Then I rest, but that is because I am forced to do so. Sometimes friends invite me out to have fun, and when they do, I go. I know it is good to have time away, so I do. That is why I have been exercising so much in the last three months; it serves as a good stress reliever. That, and I insist it is time to lose some weight for good (down 29 pounds).
Here is the thing. I can be angry about things and situations when I need to be, because I know that with everything that happens, God is in control. I can yell at God. God can take it; really big shoulders you know. When things don’t make sense, it is really okay. There isn’t anything I can do about it, except let it go. Let God make sense out of the nonsense, and when I hit the wall, stop, pick myself up, and go again until the next time, knowing that there will always be another wall around somewhere.